Lent vs. Verna's Venture

     Lent began March 5, only a few days after my venture began. While Lent will be over tomorrow, Easter Sunday, after only 40 days, my journey has just begun and will last far longer than the 40 days we just spent preparing for Easter.

     Easter has always been one of my favorite holidays. It meant many meaningful church services, a return of warmer weather, new baby calves and kittens (when I was growing up on the farm), and anticipation of the welcome changes spring brings. 

    

     This year Lent was different however.

 

Easter preparation was a distant thought in my mind. I was too busy reading, processing, and dealing with other challenges...except on Sunday mornings.

 

     Sunday mornings have never been difficult until Lent arrived this year. The first Sunday of Lent was the first Sunday mass we attended since my diagnosis.

 

As we sang the gathering song, "Jerusalem, My Destiny" I could not get through it without tears. The first words are, "I have fixed my eyes on your hills, Jerusalem, my destiny! Though I cannot see the end for me, I cannot turn away. We have set our hearts for the way; This journey is my destiny. Let no one walk alone. The journey makes us one." 

 

This song resonated in my mind as I kept thinking about how it is now my song...my song about my journey through cancer. "I have fixed my eyes on your hills, Jerusalem, CANCER is my destiny! Though I cannot see the end for me, I cannot turn away (This line is soooo true...I cannot turn away!!!). We (Arland, family, friends) have set our hearts for the way; This journey is my destiny. Let no one walk alone (and ever since my diagnosis, I have NOT once walked alone).The journey makes us one (all the people who have sent thoughts, prayers, cards, gifts, and kind words are now part of my journey, my venture)."

 

Each and every Lenten Sunday as we sang this song, now my song, tears flowed.

 

   Lent is over tomorrow. Tomorrow will bring new songs for Easter and for the rest of the church year. We will no longer sing my song in church until the next Lenten season when my journey will have been in progress for well over a year.

 However, just because we are no longer singing the song in church, that doesn't mean it is not haunting my thoughts..."I have fixed my eyes....Though I cannot see the end for me, I cannot turn away. We have set our hearts for the way; This journey is my destiny..."